Transcript
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From the time that they pronounced me deaf was a good 45 minutes.
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They cut my clothes and then they paddled my heart, my heart had stopped.
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And I could see people screaming and crying, but I didn't realize that was actually my
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physical body because I was somewhere else.
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The only thing that I could feel, if you could imagine, absolute love and peace, there wasn't
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anything else to be felt.
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I was greeted by people I'd known in the past.
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I'm back home again.
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Incredibly safe and felt at home.
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Welcome everybody to Round Trip Death, and I'd like to welcome all the way from Maine
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in the United States, Brandon Densmore.
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Good morning.
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Hey, Eric. How you doing?
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Thanks for inviting me on the show.
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You're very welcome and I'm doing great.
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I hope you're doing well as well.
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Would you mind letting our listeners get to know you just a little bit?
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Who's Brandon?
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Yeah, my name is Brandon.
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I love coaching.
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That's what I do for career now, and I'm a painter.
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I like painting little statues, little miniatures.
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Been doing it for quite some time.
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Love practicing new techniques with painting and light and shadow and understanding color
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and stuff like that.
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That's what I'm doing currently.
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I have a son, Daniel.
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He's a year and a half old, and I'm happily married to the love of my life, Mary Marcel,
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and we are living in a beautiful home that we bought here in Union, Maine.
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That is fantastic.
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That one and a half year old age, I love that age.
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It's amazing.
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They don't get much better than that, so I hope you're totally enjoying every minute
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of that.
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I am.
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I'm researching Montessori, which is like a teaching method slash lifestyle, and I'm
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so glad that I found this out now while he's still only a year and a half, and I'm working
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on creating a Montessori environment.
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It just encourages children to, it promotes their natural curiosity, and it's a great
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philosophy, so I'm excited about that.
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Now, you said you love coaching.
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Are you talking football, basketball, or people?
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People, I'm a certified spiritual coach, so I'm talking about people.
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Great.
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All right.
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Well, I want to jump right into it.
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You're a good boy now, but a few years ago, you were into some stuff maybe wasn't so good
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for you.
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That's true.
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I'm a recovered opiate addict.
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Yeah, I was into some pretty dark stuff for a long time, and it kind of progressed over
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the years, but it ended with a heroin overdose back in 2014.
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It's been about 10 years now.
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Do you mind if I asked how the addiction got started?
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Yeah.
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Spoiler alert, I'm going to talk about maybe some stuff that might trigger people.
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If you don't want to hear about that kind of thing, you might want to turn the channel
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now, but I was sexually molested when I was eight years old, and that shattered my self-esteem,
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my self-confidence, and then I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness.
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Taught me a lot of great values, but it kind of made the other children at school see me
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as different, I think, and it was easy for them to single me out and bully me.
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I was bullied horrendously through middle school, and I only went to one year of high
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school, so I got out.
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But anyways, I was diagnosed, so that kind of set up a lot of emotional turmoil as a
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young child, and then I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease and sacrilegexpondylitis.
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It's basically arthritis of the spine and stomach, like intestines.
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That's what the Crohn's disease is.
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It's very painful, and I was put on opiates at age 14.
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Wow.
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And it was, what, 18 years or something later that you had this overdose?
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Correct.
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Yep.
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They are so addictive.
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They are.
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They are.
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Okay.
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Tell us about the heroin overdose.
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Well, I was waiting for my guy to show up, my dealer, and I was in my mom's apartment,
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and I'd been in withdrawals for three days, and it's kind of hard to explain what a withdrawal
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is like for people who aren't addicted to opiates, but it's just full of anxiety, time
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standing still, not comfortable in my own skin, moving around in the chair, keep looking
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at the clock in only a minute as fast, and all of these anxieties inside of me just screaming,
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these voices, you're not good enough.
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Your life sucks.
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You have X, Y, and Z problems, and it's just all of that stuff is just in my face and evident
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as I'm waiting for this guy to show up and spend three days living hell, right?
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So finally the guy gets there, and he brings me the stuff, and then I do some, and it's
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like steam rolling off a hot lake in mid-summer, the anxiety, the stress, it all just evaporated.
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Finally, I can collect myself, and I can think clearly, and I don't have all these voices,
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these negative thoughts in my head screaming at the top of their lungs.
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So it felt good until I realized that I was dying, and it was like my breath was slowing
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down, and I felt like I was falling into a hole.
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Then next thing I know, I'm standing beside myself, and I'm looking at my dead body on
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the couch.
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And oddly enough, it didn't seem strange to me.
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I knew that I had died, and I was looking at my body, but it wasn't odd.
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It wasn't strange, and that's weird.
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But I'm looking at myself, and I'm wondering, what was the point of my life?
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I was sexually molested.
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I was bullied in school.
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I was put on these opiate medications, and I went through this whole educational journey.
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I dropped out of school in the ninth grade and was in a fist fight at age 21, which
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caused me to question my identity, because I had believed up to that point at age 21
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that I was stupid, that I wasn't going to go anywhere in life.
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Somehow I had adopted that belief, probably from being bullied so much in school.
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So I had adopted these beliefs.
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I was in a fist fight at age 21, and questioned those beliefs and decided to test them to
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see if they were actually true.
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Am I really stupid?
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So dropped out of school in the ninth grade, had the fist fight, went back to school, got
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my GED, then went to a two-year community college, graduated from there, and then I
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won a full scholarship to go to Yale's sister school, Basser College, where I graduated with
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a philosophy degree.
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So I guess I wasn't stupid, right?
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So anyways, sometimes we have these negative beliefs about ourselves that we just kind
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of accept as true, but they're not actually true.
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They're not objectively true.
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So I tested the belief.
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But anyways, here I am.
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I'm standing next to my body.
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I'm looking at the dead body, and I'm wondering, what was the point of all that?
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By the way, the people that are listening can't see you, and I can tell this is hard to talk
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about, and I really appreciate you opening up like this.
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As you're standing next to your body, it seemed like you didn't feel much emotion.
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You didn't feel like, oh no, what am I doing here?
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I've got to figure out how to get back in, or I've got to something.
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It was almost a matter of fact.
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Is that the case?
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Yeah, it's very odd, because you would think that you might be afraid, or maybe you'd
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be surprised, or you'd be wondering what was happening, maybe you'd be confused.
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But that just wasn't the case.
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I was just standing there, like you said, in a very matter of fact way, looking at my
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body contemplating the meaning of my life, because now my life was over.
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And what kinds of thoughts came to your mind?
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What answers were there?
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Well, as I was standing there thinking about my life, all of a sudden, there were no answers.
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But I became aware of the presence, and I looked around.
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There was nobody there.
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No spirit, no nothing.
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You know how you can feel that somebody's watching you sometimes?
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Sure.
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That's what it was.
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It was like I was being observed.
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So you weren't met by a bright light and ancestors and all that kind of thing?
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No bright light, no ancestors.
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All I am is standing beside myself, looking at my body, contemplating the meaning of my
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life up to that point, because it seemed kind of meaningless.
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Like why did I go through all of this stuff?
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Why was I sexually molested?
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Why was I bullied?
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Why was I addicted to drugs?
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Why did I have this educational journey where I discovered that I had held false beliefs
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about myself and then overcame those beliefs?
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What was the point of it all?
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And then all of a sudden, there's this presence, I look around, nothing there.
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I could just feel that I was being observed.
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And then that's when everything changed.
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So I was basically, I don't know if anybody out there is a Star Trek fan, but I like to
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talk about the holodeck in Star Trek.
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It was like I was in a holodeck.
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And for those of you who don't know, a holodeck is like a advanced computer program that uses
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holographic technology and it seemed absolutely real.
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And it can take you anywhere.
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You can talk to any person, you can go to any location, you can pretty much do anything.
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And it's just, it's composed of light that is solid and you're just instantly transported.
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That's what this was like.
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I was shown two visions.
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The first was I saw the life that I could have lived had I not died.
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So I was shown image after image after image.
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And after each image that I was shown, there was this idea of this would have happened,
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but you're dead now and it's not going to happen.
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I was shown all of the people, the friends that I would have met, the child that I would
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have had, the woman that I would have met and married and fell in love with, all of the
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joyful experiences that were there for me, but that I would never experience because
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I had passed on.
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And the second thing I was shown was everybody that was affected by my death.
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I was shown like the funeral, the people who spoke at the funeral, all the different conversations
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that were had about my passing between family members and friends.
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And in particular, I was shown this very vivid image of my mother finding my dead body on
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her couch.
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I had pus running out of my mouth and my body was all discolored.
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And she was out in service as a Jehovah's Witness going door to door.
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And then she came home and found my dead body.
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And when she first saw my dead body, she had all of these memories that I could see.
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I could see these memories and I could feel the emotions of the memories that she had.
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And they were memories of raising me as a little baby, first foods, tickling me and
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giggling, me twirling her hair with my finger around my finger, first steps, getting snowed
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in, eating cookies, image after image after image of these joyful experiences that my
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mother had as raising me as a little baby.
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And then the next thing I know, she starts screaming, my baby, my baby, oh my God, my
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little baby, no, no, my baby, my baby, my baby, my baby.
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Did that make you feel guilty or remorse?
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It crushed me.
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It was overwhelming that this had that kind of an effect.
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And it just ruined her like the pit of despair and sadness and grief of losing the little
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baby.
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I was just overwhelmed and then the presence is there this whole time.
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I heard a voice at that point that said, and it was just a very matter of fact kind of
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voice.
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Now your life is over and you wasted it.
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And that was like a kick in the stomach.
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And then I pleaded with the presence to not die that I can't let this happen.
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And I begged.
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I said, I will do anything to avert this.
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Whatever is required of me, I will do it to overcome this addiction.
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Please don't let me die.
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Send me back, send me back.
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And then the next thing I know, I'm back in my body gasping for breath.
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Do you have any idea who that presence was?
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Who or what?
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That's a hard question to answer.
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It's like asking the question, what is God or who is God?
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Was it God?
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Was it an archangel?
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Was it some kind of a divine spirit of some type?
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Jesus, Buddha?
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The presence never identified itself.
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But I know now that what happened was an expression of divine love.
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It was tough love, you might say, because it shook me to the core.
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And that's what I needed.
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I needed to be shaken.
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Like wake up, you're going to die.
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And this is the effect of it.
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And you could have this kind of life, but look at what you're doing.
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And it's because of your choices.
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Before we move on, was there anything else to it, to this experience while you were next
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to your body?
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It was just, it seemed like an eternity in an instant.
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And I was shown so many things, image after image after image after image, conversations
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between people.
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And basically, in retrospect, I now know that I was shown the divine blueprint for my life.
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That future that I was shown that wasn't going to happen because I had died, well, I was
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given a second chance.
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And I have been through, I've had to go through a lot of spiritual refinement, like confronting
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my inner demons, things like that, a lot of work on myself.
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But I told the presence I'd be willing to do anything.
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And I followed through on that and I haven't used opiates since 2014.
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And now I went from having, you know, false friends, self-confidence issues, being depressed,
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all of these past traumas and things that caused a lot of pain.
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I was angry.
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I didn't have any money in the bank.
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I was living in a crappy little apartment.
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All of that has, you know, I didn't know what my purpose was.
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All of that has transformed.
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Now, you know, I know my purpose.
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I'm confident.
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I'm calm, cool and collected.
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I am married now to love my life.
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I live in a beautiful house.
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I have a garden, a beautiful sun who is just a delight.
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And I'm doing the work that I love every day.
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That's like, that future existed and now it's actually manifested and I can see that it's
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beautiful.
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I'm just curious, did you see any more of your future that is still yet to come?
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Just the numbers of people that I'm here to help.
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I was shown thousands and thousands and thousands of people.
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I feel like that, you know, I'm helping people now and that's wonderful.
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But that there's more to that and more joy and more fulfillment and stuff that's coming.
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So I'm guessing that's why you do coaching now.
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Yes.
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It's a good way to help a lot of people.
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Yeah.
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And getting the word out there about the experience, you know, that really ultimately death is
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nothing really to fear.
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I mean, what a load off, right?
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Load off the shoulders that death isn't really something that we have to be terrified of.
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Not only that, but that there is a divine plan to our life that our choices matter,
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that we can transform ourselves.
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And that's part of why I'm doing these videos is just to get that message out there.
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You mentioned the term divine love a minute ago.
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Explain what that is.
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I think it's acceptance, like total acceptance.
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About a year after I had that NDE, I had gone through the steps of alcoholics anonymous
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and those steps are designed, the 12 steps they call them, they're designed to give someone
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a spiritual awakening.
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And Bill Wilson, the creator of alcoholics anonymous had this kind of spiritual experience
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and they call it a white light experience where he was in his room and this white light
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came.
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It was like the presence of God, but I had a similar type of experience about a year after
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I had that near death experience where I had been having a hard time.
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I'd been praying and this light, I was in my bathroom, this light came down through the
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ceiling and just bathed me in a radiant energy.
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The only term I could use to describe it is an x-ray love energy where it just penetrated
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every aspect of my being and I was overwhelmed.
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I could feel the acceptance and I started having all of these thoughts like I'm not
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worthy of this experience and I started thinking about my past and the different things I had
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done wrong and I'm not worthy for this experience.
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And whatever this being was, whether it was God, Jesus, Buddha, it was something very
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pure and holy and it came down through the ceiling and it didn't care about any of those
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mistakes I had made.
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I was judging myself, but it was not judging me.
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It was like, okay, interesting, you have those thoughts.
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Let's just move right through those thoughts and its energy just penetrated the thoughts,
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penetrated every aspect of my emotions, my thinking, my body and I was just bathed in
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this warm, appreciative, non-judgmental love acceptance.
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We're someone out there that may be going through an opiate addiction.
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What advice do you have for them?
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What worked for you besides the NDE?
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So I went through the steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, but first of all, if someone's watching this
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right now and they're addicted to opiates, that there is a solution to the addiction
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problem because when you're stuck in the opiate addiction, it can really seem like there's
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no way out.
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It consumes your life.
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There's no solution.
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There's no way out.
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This is just how it is and I just have to keep going.
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But you need to realize that there is a solution and if you need help, contact me and I'll
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tell you more about the solution and you can change.
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You can, that there is a divine plan.
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You're meant to live a better life than this and you can overcome this.
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You're ready to go all in.
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Are you ready to put your cards on the table?
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Total commitment.
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Total commitment helps, but before total commitment, just a willingness, a willingness to entertain
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the possibility that there is a solution and you can overcome these opiates, whether it's
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heroin, methadone, oxy-cotton, all of these different opiates.
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You can overcome them and you can live, you can be happy and you can experience fulfillment
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in life without the use of these substances.
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So it seems like this experience completely changed your life.
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I'd say that's fair.
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Tell me what else you learned from it.
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So a lot of what I learned from the near-death experience came after the near-death experience.
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For instance, when I was sexually molested, I realized after this near-death experience,
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when I was going through the steps of alcoholics, anonymous that that pain from that hadn't
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been resolved and I needed to go back to the basics and get to the root cause of the addiction.
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Because if I didn't get to the root cause, it would just grow back like a weed and I'd
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return to the old behavior.
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But anyways, I had to learn how to forgive and that resentment and anger overpassed things
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that have happened, traumas, things that people did to me, that that was really sucking the
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energy from me and having a majorly destructive effect in my life.
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But I had to learn how to totally forgive among many other things.
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Even when somebody doesn't ask for it, that's when it's the hardest, isn't it?
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It can be until you explore the techniques of forgiveness because you really have to
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be ready.
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Right.
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You mentioned something to me the other day, a term, quantum forgiveness.
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Is that something that you came up with?
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Yeah.
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I'm building a course right now, an online course called Quantum Forgiveness.
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And it's how to take back your time and energy so that you can quickly accomplish your most
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important life goals.
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But what does that mean, quantum forgiveness?
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It's the kind of forgiveness that transforms the reality that you're experiencing.
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It's like jumping from, I don't know if you've ever seen the show Quantum Leap.
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Sure.
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It's like moving from one existence into another, from one person into another.
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And it changes really, it's almost like, I don't know if it's jumping timelines, you
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might call it, or entering a parallel universe.
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But when you change yourself through quantum entanglement, you get into studying quantum
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physics, there's this thing, quantum entanglement.
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And it's basically faster than like causality.
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So you change something inside of yourself and it alters everything else instantly.
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Give me an example.
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You forgive, like in my case, I forgave the guy who sexually molested me when I was eight.
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And I practiced some techniques and came to a place of deep, profound forgiveness.
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And that changed something inside of me, which also affected all my family members.
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It changed the way I interact in the world.
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And because the way I interact in the world changed, that interaction changes others.
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And then I believe that it actually helped uplift all of humanity because we're all connected.
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We're all fundamentally one at a deep level.
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Everything is one.
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We put labels on things, we differentiate things with our human mind and our consciousness.
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We have these concepts of different and the same and one and not one.
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But at a fundamental level, the whole universe is connected.
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And we're all one.
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And when I released that karma of resentment toward the guy who sexually molested me, it
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actually shifted something for everyone.
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And now everyone has more of an opportunity to practice forgiveness themselves.
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It gets a little bit easier.
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It's quantum forgiveness.
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Just trying to absorb that.
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I need to study quantum physics more.
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This comes up on the podcast all the time.
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And I don't have a good enough understanding.
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Maybe that should be one of my big objectives this year is to understand this whole thing
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better.
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So most people have not had an NDE like you that helped them go, okay, before this was
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my old life, after this is going to be my new life.
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Any advice for people that need to make a big change in their life but aren't going
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to have a big significant thing like you had?
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How do they say today's the day?
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That's tough because you can say today's the day and then you can try it and then fail
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miserably and fall right on your face.
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I would say to make sure to prepare.
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And if it's something like a heroin addiction to get some help and if you want, you can
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reach out to me and talk to me about it.
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I talk to people all the time about these kind of things and I don't judge.
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I just listen.
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And there are solutions.
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But if it's something really significant, you're going to need to be prepared to maybe
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put your life on pause and go all in, right?
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Talk to some people about the decision that you're going to make that today is the day
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and just make sure to have a plan and rally your support system and then be willing to
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do whatever it takes to succeed.
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Okay.
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Well, I appreciate all that advice.
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We'll put your contact info on the show notes in case people want to contact you.
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And any last thoughts, advice or other that you want to leave with us?
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Have you heard of the logos, Eric?
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I don't know what it is.
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In my business, a logo, I know what that is because I helped produce hundreds of them.
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But go ahead with logos.
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Yeah.
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00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:11,320
Well, the word logo is actually connected to this concept as are the words like logic
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and psychology, right, sociology.
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Yeah, that root word is there.
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Right.
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And John 1-1 in the Bible says, in the beginning was the word and the word was with God and
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the word was God.
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But if you go back to the original Greek, it's logos.
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So this is something that's been written about for a long time and Heraclitus, the ancient
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Greek philosopher wrote about the logos.
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But it's basically a divine, my understanding of it is a divine blueprint that we all have
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a reason for being here.
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And it's just a matter of turning down the noise of the world, right, to really kind
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of get a glimpse of what that means for you.
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Like what is the divine plan for your life?
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And there is one to understand this logos and to find meaning in your life.
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The kind of meaning that brings you fulfillment and a feeling of contribution and service.
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And figuring that out can do a lot for you as far as like being happy, content, satisfied
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with life.
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That will also help to self-esteem issues like what you used to deal with.
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Absolutely.
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Because when you have a purpose, you are pursuing the purpose and you're generating your own
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meaning.
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You're not just being pushed around by the world, going from one emergency to the next.
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But having that as a kind of anchor.
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And this guy, Dr. Victor Frankl, wrote a book called Logotherapy.
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He was a psychotherapist who was in a Nazi concentration camp.
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And then he survived that and he wrote a book called Logotherapy.
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But it's basically meaning therapy.
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But find your meaning, find your purpose, and then have that as a crystal clear vision
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and use it as an anchor.
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All right.
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Thanks a lot, Brandon.
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Appreciate you being with us today.
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Sure.
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My pleasure.
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Thanks again for listening and sharing this podcast.
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Don't forget to hit the follow or subscribe button and sign up for our newsletter at roundtriptest.com.
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If you want to share your near-death experience or if you have questions or comments about
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the show, send an email to eric at roundtriptest.com.
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Until then, I wish you everything good that you're looking for in this life and the next.
