Atheist Sits In God's Lap - Riley's NDE (Near Death Experience)

WEBVTT

00:00:03.790 --> 00:00:06.669
From the time that they pronounced me that was

00:00:06.669 --> 00:00:10.250
a good 45 minutes They cut my clothes and then

00:00:10.250 --> 00:00:13.609
they paddled my heart my heart stopped and I

00:00:13.609 --> 00:00:17.129
could see people screaming and crying But I didn't

00:00:17.129 --> 00:00:19.510
realize that was actually my physical body because

00:00:19.510 --> 00:00:22.890
I was somewhere else The only thing that I could

00:00:22.890 --> 00:00:26.809
feel if you can imagine Absolute love and peace

00:00:26.809 --> 00:00:29.829
there wasn't anything else to be felt. I was

00:00:29.829 --> 00:00:33.049
greeted by people I'd known in the past I'm back

00:00:33.049 --> 00:00:36.829
home again. Incredibly safe and felt at home.

00:00:38.909 --> 00:00:40.829
Welcome, welcome to Round Trip Death everybody.

00:00:41.289 --> 00:00:44.170
We are going to have so much fun today. We're

00:00:44.170 --> 00:00:47.829
going to the beautiful island of St. Thomas and

00:00:47.829 --> 00:00:49.770
here's the big question that we're going to have

00:00:49.770 --> 00:00:55.030
answered. What happens when an atheist has an

00:00:55.030 --> 00:00:59.380
NDE and meets Someone that makes them question

00:00:59.380 --> 00:01:01.960
everything they've thought was real in the past.

00:01:02.380 --> 00:01:05.120
Here's our special guest Riley Courtright. How

00:01:05.120 --> 00:01:08.260
are you Riley? I'm so good and better than I

00:01:08.260 --> 00:01:13.560
could possibly have ever dreamt possible. Which

00:01:13.560 --> 00:01:16.659
is so amazing since it was only what seven months

00:01:16.659 --> 00:01:20.579
ago that you actually died. It's been seven months

00:01:20.579 --> 00:01:23.480
this recent time. I've died twice in the last

00:01:23.480 --> 00:01:29.420
18 months and boy did they fuel each other. Well

00:01:29.420 --> 00:01:32.299
I'm glad you're having a fantastic morning and

00:01:32.299 --> 00:01:35.519
you're making me smile so I really appreciate

00:01:35.519 --> 00:01:39.439
that. Before we jump into your story which is

00:01:39.439 --> 00:01:42.140
people are going to absolutely love this tell

00:01:42.140 --> 00:01:45.799
us just a little bit about who Riley is or is

00:01:45.799 --> 00:01:48.040
it Lily maybe we'll get to that at some point.

00:01:48.269 --> 00:01:51.750
So I've always known myself as Riley. I'm a creative

00:01:51.750 --> 00:01:54.530
at heart, ultimately, and a type B personality.

00:01:55.290 --> 00:01:58.170
I've been a piercer for 10 years. I owned a studio.

00:01:58.569 --> 00:02:01.310
And I think it's important to note that I was

00:02:01.310 --> 00:02:04.390
raised by incredibly loving, kind parents, but

00:02:04.390 --> 00:02:07.129
who never spoke about faith. I had one parent

00:02:07.129 --> 00:02:10.409
that was very... very bluntly atheist and one

00:02:10.409 --> 00:02:13.530
who did have a higher belief in a power. But

00:02:13.530 --> 00:02:16.830
I was raised much closer to science than I ever

00:02:16.830 --> 00:02:20.189
was religion. And I also have a genetic condition

00:02:20.189 --> 00:02:24.270
called Ehlers -Danlos syndrome. So I had lost

00:02:24.270 --> 00:02:28.110
a lot of... I had lost a lot. You know, I believed

00:02:28.110 --> 00:02:31.469
that I wanted to want to believe in God. I'm

00:02:31.469 --> 00:02:34.729
getting ahead of myself now, aren't I? It's okay.

00:02:34.919 --> 00:02:37.699
It's okay. And by the way, this is, I think,

00:02:37.800 --> 00:02:39.800
the first time you've really shared this publicly,

00:02:40.020 --> 00:02:42.800
isn't it? It is. It really is. It is. It is.

00:02:42.900 --> 00:02:46.360
It's interesting how connected and how complex,

00:02:46.360 --> 00:02:51.740
right? But how truly connected it all is. I knew

00:02:51.740 --> 00:02:54.800
that my genetics held a shorter lifespan from

00:02:54.800 --> 00:02:58.340
the time that I was a young kid. So while I wanted

00:02:58.340 --> 00:03:02.050
to want to believe in God, There was nothing

00:03:02.050 --> 00:03:04.490
throughout my life to ever show me that that

00:03:04.490 --> 00:03:07.949
was that that was real. And I was always really

00:03:07.949 --> 00:03:11.069
healthy until I wasn't. And I started to get

00:03:11.069 --> 00:03:15.270
sick at 28. I'm 35 now. And that is, I think,

00:03:15.330 --> 00:03:20.009
really where everything kind of begins. OK, well,

00:03:20.229 --> 00:03:23.090
let's do this. First of all, before we talked

00:03:23.090 --> 00:03:26.580
the other day, I had never heard of EDS. Would

00:03:26.580 --> 00:03:28.740
love to start sort of at the beginning if you

00:03:28.740 --> 00:03:31.439
would give a very brief explanation of what it

00:03:31.439 --> 00:03:34.060
is and by the way I did hit it hard on Google

00:03:34.060 --> 00:03:38.360
since then But if you get a very give a very

00:03:38.360 --> 00:03:42.419
brief explanation of what it is how it affected

00:03:42.419 --> 00:03:47.210
you and how it led to these two incidents Sure.

00:03:47.909 --> 00:03:51.469
Well, EDS is a connective tissue disorder. Your

00:03:51.469 --> 00:03:56.069
connective tissue is what creates and supports

00:03:56.069 --> 00:03:58.310
the collagen in your body, which is what keeps

00:03:58.310 --> 00:04:01.370
your organs together. So I was always really

00:04:01.370 --> 00:04:06.349
flexible as a kid in very unique ways, right?

00:04:06.610 --> 00:04:10.129
Not realizing that my insides, my organs were

00:04:10.129 --> 00:04:13.949
able to do that too. So there's many subtypes

00:04:13.949 --> 00:04:17.920
of EDS. I have vascular EDS. which is fatal but

00:04:17.920 --> 00:04:20.759
I do have complex hypermobile tendencies with

00:04:20.759 --> 00:04:23.800
that and EDS is something that we think has been

00:04:23.800 --> 00:04:26.939
around for a long time but hasn't been diagnosed

00:04:26.939 --> 00:04:30.439
until recently truly because of how many you

00:04:30.439 --> 00:04:32.959
really don't find out until autopsies right I

00:04:32.959 --> 00:04:34.800
had always known I was gonna donate my body to

00:04:34.800 --> 00:04:37.560
science my mom did the same thing because it

00:04:37.560 --> 00:04:41.649
causes your body to to die from the inside out,

00:04:41.910 --> 00:04:45.110
right? And my organs would fuse together, they

00:04:45.110 --> 00:04:47.990
would just cease to function. I mean, all kinds

00:04:47.990 --> 00:04:50.550
of things and there's no known cause, but it's

00:04:50.550 --> 00:04:53.389
ultimately your connective tissue. Wasn't there

00:04:53.389 --> 00:04:55.610
anything that medical science could do for it?

00:04:55.949 --> 00:04:59.750
I was told that I wasn't eligible for an organ

00:04:59.750 --> 00:05:02.750
transplant because it's a connective tissue disorder

00:05:02.750 --> 00:05:05.730
that my body would basically destroy any new

00:05:05.730 --> 00:05:08.769
organ that I got. So, you know, I would go into

00:05:08.769 --> 00:05:10.709
kidney failure. They'd pull me out of kidney

00:05:10.709 --> 00:05:13.529
failure and send me on my way. My heart would

00:05:13.529 --> 00:05:15.709
stop at home. My husband would resuscitate me,

00:05:15.790 --> 00:05:17.670
rush me to the hospital, and they'd say, come

00:05:17.670 --> 00:05:22.170
back if it happens again. I was bleeding internally

00:05:22.170 --> 00:05:25.750
so severely at one point. It was coming out of

00:05:25.750 --> 00:05:30.810
my eyes and my ears and, you know, all they do

00:05:30.810 --> 00:05:32.850
is they put me on more medications and they made

00:05:32.850 --> 00:05:35.110
me a guinea pig and it's more testing. And what

00:05:35.110 --> 00:05:37.170
they did was they took away my quality of life

00:05:37.170 --> 00:05:40.389
because I ended up slowly and painfully dying,

00:05:40.389 --> 00:05:43.269
right, in a wheelchair and on oxygen. I spent

00:05:43.269 --> 00:05:45.269
more time in the hospital than I spent anywhere

00:05:45.269 --> 00:05:48.449
else. But no, it was only when I decided to give

00:05:48.449 --> 00:05:53.120
it all up that God came to my rescue. Okay, after

00:05:53.120 --> 00:05:56.000
we talk about your NDEs, I want to talk just

00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:57.800
a little bit, and I'm telling you this so you

00:05:57.800 --> 00:06:01.000
remind me if I forget, a little bit about how

00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:04.019
you've gotten so better over the last few months.

00:06:04.579 --> 00:06:06.860
Replaced my heart and my lungs. I know that sounds

00:06:06.860 --> 00:06:10.199
crazy, but like he even told me that. I mean,

00:06:10.259 --> 00:06:12.779
and there's, there's no mistaking. There's no,

00:06:13.060 --> 00:06:17.500
there is no... As an atheist, for example, my

00:06:17.500 --> 00:06:20.339
brother is a nanoparticle physicist, right? And

00:06:20.339 --> 00:06:22.240
so when you're raised close to the sciences,

00:06:22.660 --> 00:06:24.899
you believe in the things that you can see and

00:06:24.899 --> 00:06:27.420
touch and hear and smell. But let me tell you,

00:06:27.480 --> 00:06:31.819
Eric, I smelled and tasted and saw God. So he

00:06:31.819 --> 00:06:34.740
cured me. I still have a lot of physical therapy,

00:06:34.899 --> 00:06:38.579
like, sure. But like, no, it was when I died

00:06:38.579 --> 00:06:40.740
and came back to life. It was like overnight.

00:06:40.860 --> 00:06:43.579
But yes, I'm sorry. See, now I'm I do like it.

00:06:43.639 --> 00:06:47.199
This is, it's, I should just go away and let

00:06:47.199 --> 00:06:50.180
you do your thing for an hour here. It'd be a

00:06:50.180 --> 00:06:53.199
much better show. You were telling me you actually

00:06:53.199 --> 00:06:56.040
went to St. Thomas to die, to have a great place

00:06:56.040 --> 00:07:03.379
to die. I did. So after goodness. So the first

00:07:03.379 --> 00:07:08.040
NDE I think was was confusing for me because

00:07:08.040 --> 00:07:10.800
I hadn't been declared dead. It happened when

00:07:10.800 --> 00:07:13.600
I was at home. I had just been sent from the

00:07:13.600 --> 00:07:16.560
hospital of them basically saying, here's more

00:07:16.560 --> 00:07:19.060
meds, there's really nothing we can do. Medicine

00:07:19.060 --> 00:07:24.639
doesn't beat genetics. Man, both times I woke

00:07:24.639 --> 00:07:28.839
up and I knew the day that was my last day. And

00:07:28.839 --> 00:07:32.579
it didn't, it wasn't as like concerning as you

00:07:32.579 --> 00:07:36.519
might think. I woke up to the most incredible

00:07:36.519 --> 00:07:40.680
music and I can only describe it as a symphony

00:07:40.680 --> 00:07:45.180
of orchestras harmonizing together and it was

00:07:45.180 --> 00:07:48.680
harps and trumpets and violins and violas and

00:07:48.680 --> 00:07:51.420
flutes and and so many of the instruments were

00:07:51.420 --> 00:07:54.279
instruments that we don't have on earth and I

00:07:54.279 --> 00:07:57.620
immediately woke my husband up to make sure that

00:07:57.620 --> 00:08:00.810
he couldn't hear it to see if he could hear it

00:08:00.810 --> 00:08:04.089
he couldn't and over the course of hours it became

00:08:04.089 --> 00:08:10.230
deafening and it was so beautiful it was so intrinsic

00:08:10.230 --> 00:08:15.529
and and captivating and you know dying is a funny

00:08:15.529 --> 00:08:19.639
thing because it all sort of happens at once

00:08:19.639 --> 00:08:22.379
right the moment that you realize your soul has

00:08:22.379 --> 00:08:24.639
left your body and that you're not a body with

00:08:24.639 --> 00:08:27.459
a soul rather a soul with the body right the

00:08:27.459 --> 00:08:31.699
moment it leaves the music the colors that you

00:08:31.699 --> 00:08:36.519
that you see it all happens so quick so i guess

00:08:36.519 --> 00:08:42.919
it starts at home i had been in and out of consciousness

00:08:42.919 --> 00:08:45.639
for days right because as you're dying you're

00:08:45.639 --> 00:08:51.139
not coherent the whole time and I was down to

00:08:51.139 --> 00:08:53.639
about a breath every four minutes. You know,

00:08:53.679 --> 00:08:56.120
we had decided that I wanted to die at home and

00:08:56.120 --> 00:08:58.460
not in a hospital, so I'm like peacefully in

00:08:58.460 --> 00:09:02.519
my little meditation spot, but it was also a

00:09:02.519 --> 00:09:05.519
spot that I could lay down and go peacefully,

00:09:05.519 --> 00:09:09.879
right? And from the music, I guess, because the

00:09:09.879 --> 00:09:14.960
music was the first thing, there was this incredibly

00:09:14.960 --> 00:09:20.210
loud voice it was the voice of God and he asked

00:09:20.210 --> 00:09:25.169
me what do I believe and it comes like there

00:09:25.169 --> 00:09:28.730
is a megaphone right I mean except it's inside

00:09:28.730 --> 00:09:33.070
your head it's so loud but in the most it not

00:09:33.070 --> 00:09:38.250
in a loud way in a captivating way and it's calm

00:09:38.250 --> 00:09:43.429
and it's deep and it's familiar You know, I say

00:09:43.429 --> 00:09:45.289
that people who those those the people that believe

00:09:45.289 --> 00:09:47.710
we're in a simulation like what I heard would

00:09:47.710 --> 00:09:52.830
have driven them to the end because it I mean

00:09:52.830 --> 00:09:58.690
it's And he started he starts talking to me I

00:09:58.690 --> 00:10:02.269
Had been I like I said, I really wanted to believe

00:10:02.269 --> 00:10:06.710
in a God But did I? Absolutely not, right? I

00:10:06.710 --> 00:10:08.889
had tried to be a good person my whole life and

00:10:08.889 --> 00:10:11.490
all I was met with was seeing terrible things

00:10:11.490 --> 00:10:13.669
around me and people dying and questions with

00:10:13.669 --> 00:10:17.590
no answers and, you know, terrible people who

00:10:17.590 --> 00:10:20.629
great things happen to, right? My awareness of

00:10:20.629 --> 00:10:24.409
it all just couldn't explain a God. So first

00:10:24.409 --> 00:10:26.870
of all, what did you answer when you were asked

00:10:26.870 --> 00:10:29.529
that question about what do you believe? That

00:10:29.529 --> 00:10:32.879
I believed in the power of light and love. I

00:10:32.879 --> 00:10:37.100
think the only thing that kept me from potentially

00:10:37.100 --> 00:10:41.320
committing suicide years before you know because

00:10:41.320 --> 00:10:45.299
I had lost from the time before I was 30 I had

00:10:45.299 --> 00:10:47.980
lost my grandparents and cousins aunts uncles

00:10:47.980 --> 00:10:50.879
both parents my first husband my best friend

00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:54.000
right like while all the worst people I knew

00:10:54.000 --> 00:10:56.759
were thriving right that really really gives

00:10:56.759 --> 00:11:00.990
to you And dying gets to finding out that you

00:11:00.990 --> 00:11:04.330
can try to be a good person and all you get is

00:11:04.330 --> 00:11:08.269
the sickness, right? I'm so sorry, because now

00:11:08.269 --> 00:11:11.809
I feel like I'm catty -cornering, walling myself.

00:11:12.700 --> 00:11:15.039
I said I believed in the power of love. That's

00:11:15.039 --> 00:11:17.279
really, that's what I said because with all the

00:11:17.279 --> 00:11:19.519
people dying around me, I did. I wanted to believe

00:11:19.519 --> 00:11:21.139
in God because I wanted to believe that they

00:11:21.139 --> 00:11:24.340
were angels. After my first husband died, I could

00:11:24.340 --> 00:11:26.480
have sworn I heard him talk to me once and he

00:11:26.480 --> 00:11:28.259
said that my purpose was to bring more light

00:11:28.259 --> 00:11:30.679
into the world and I took that and I ran with

00:11:30.679 --> 00:11:32.919
it. So I said I believed in the power of light

00:11:32.919 --> 00:11:36.179
and the power of love. From there it felt like

00:11:36.179 --> 00:11:38.500
traveling. I think that's what people describe

00:11:38.500 --> 00:11:40.840
as a tunnel, but it really felt like a wormhole,

00:11:40.860 --> 00:11:44.299
like a cosmic wormhole, and it opened up into

00:11:44.299 --> 00:11:49.379
this the most beautiful little box. It was pearlescent

00:11:49.379 --> 00:11:52.720
and golden and filigreed and it opened up into

00:11:52.720 --> 00:11:56.080
this blast of color that doesn't even exist to

00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:59.200
the human naked eye. We can't even see a fraction

00:11:59.200 --> 00:12:04.809
of that. And I got from there, you get this This

00:12:04.809 --> 00:12:08.590
blast of what feels like telepathic answers and

00:12:08.590 --> 00:12:10.809
this was another moment I definitely knew I was

00:12:10.809 --> 00:12:14.090
dying right because I got to suddenly in the

00:12:14.090 --> 00:12:17.309
blink of an eye learn everything about myself

00:12:17.309 --> 00:12:20.389
my quirks my personality my character traits

00:12:20.389 --> 00:12:23.330
my metaphorical gifts that you're given along

00:12:23.330 --> 00:12:26.149
through life and if you've served your purpose

00:12:26.149 --> 00:12:29.500
and what was making me so sick and You know,

00:12:29.500 --> 00:12:32.360
it jumped into every other question I've ever

00:12:32.360 --> 00:12:35.840
wondered. Do we have free will? Why do good things

00:12:35.840 --> 00:12:39.580
happen to bad people? And why do kids get cancer?

00:12:39.860 --> 00:12:42.399
And if old souls are real, and why does a song

00:12:42.399 --> 00:12:45.480
get stuck in our head? And what is deja vu, right?

00:12:45.500 --> 00:12:48.419
Like all of it, it all gets answered at the speed

00:12:48.419 --> 00:12:51.639
of light. I got to see and talk to everybody

00:12:51.639 --> 00:12:54.379
I knew who loved and died. And it was like a

00:12:54.379 --> 00:12:56.259
Christmas carol because they each had something

00:12:56.259 --> 00:12:59.539
different to teach me and to show me. And just

00:12:59.539 --> 00:13:01.700
like that my husband said this train isn't for

00:13:01.700 --> 00:13:07.519
you to get on and I came back and all of a sudden

00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:12.210
my husband who I think in hindsight was experiencing

00:13:12.210 --> 00:13:15.470
an SDE because he looked into some portal of

00:13:15.470 --> 00:13:17.250
the fabric of the universe and heard something

00:13:17.250 --> 00:13:20.149
that I heard because he said, do you want to

00:13:20.149 --> 00:13:22.029
go to the hospital? It's not time for you to

00:13:22.029 --> 00:13:24.289
get on that train yet. And so for a minute, I'm

00:13:24.289 --> 00:13:26.029
like mind blown because I'm like, what did you

00:13:26.029 --> 00:13:28.190
just say? Because like my dead husband just said

00:13:28.190 --> 00:13:30.590
like the same thing to me, but I know you didn't

00:13:30.590 --> 00:13:33.190
hear that. Right. And like, wait, was I sitting?

00:13:33.350 --> 00:13:35.370
Was I conscious? And he's like, no, you hadn't

00:13:35.370 --> 00:13:37.690
been breathing for almost six minutes. I thought

00:13:37.690 --> 00:13:39.830
it was supposed to like. you go until I like

00:13:39.830 --> 00:13:42.590
heard that I wasn't so we take me to the hospital

00:13:42.590 --> 00:13:44.649
and then the music starts right because for days

00:13:44.649 --> 00:13:49.769
all I could hear is music and the nurses the

00:13:49.769 --> 00:13:52.009
nurses and the doctors they get you better until

00:13:52.009 --> 00:13:54.750
until they send you back right because it's a

00:13:54.750 --> 00:13:59.049
genetic fatal ailment with no cure and no real

00:13:59.049 --> 00:14:02.929
treatment And God made it really clear that we

00:14:02.929 --> 00:14:05.190
were supposed to come here, and when we tried

00:14:05.190 --> 00:14:07.289
to fight that and decide we would spend the last

00:14:07.289 --> 00:14:09.690
year of my life going out west, our barn burned

00:14:09.690 --> 00:14:11.789
down and we got a single lightning strike to

00:14:11.789 --> 00:14:15.090
our brand new RV. So God was like, no, no, you

00:14:15.090 --> 00:14:20.350
go to St. Thomas. Very subtle. We've been here

00:14:20.350 --> 00:14:23.570
now, which is beautiful. And it is hard to describe

00:14:23.570 --> 00:14:25.990
the timing of how it all happened because when

00:14:25.990 --> 00:14:28.409
I was in the hospital did come with a lot of

00:14:28.409 --> 00:14:32.350
OBEs. I distinctly remember being overhead, you

00:14:32.350 --> 00:14:34.990
know, and hearing the doctor tell my husband

00:14:34.990 --> 00:14:37.149
to say his final goodbye and make sure that my

00:14:37.149 --> 00:14:39.250
will was in order and that the dialysis didn't

00:14:39.250 --> 00:14:42.490
seem to be working and that the CDC was also

00:14:42.490 --> 00:14:45.950
monitoring my case because it's a rare ailment,

00:14:46.110 --> 00:14:48.519
right? Like all these different things. And so

00:14:48.519 --> 00:14:54.220
it is hard to know like this part happened when

00:14:54.220 --> 00:14:56.639
I was unconscious at home and this part happened

00:14:56.639 --> 00:14:58.500
when I was unconscious in the hospital, right?

00:14:58.620 --> 00:15:01.679
But there was, there was such an influx of peace

00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:04.759
and love. I had been in screaming pain for months,

00:15:04.840 --> 00:15:07.120
and I mean literally screaming pain for months

00:15:07.120 --> 00:15:10.639
with blood coming out of my eyes. And when you

00:15:10.639 --> 00:15:13.659
go, like the actual dying process is beautiful

00:15:13.659 --> 00:15:16.559
because it's this weightlessness that you can...

00:15:16.759 --> 00:15:21.919
feel. It's this laying in a perfectly warm sun

00:15:21.919 --> 00:15:24.740
patch, right? Like you can feel that overwhelming

00:15:24.740 --> 00:15:29.259
amount of love. It was everything about how connected

00:15:29.259 --> 00:15:33.299
we are and about how far off we've come because

00:15:33.299 --> 00:15:37.259
of religion and science and it felt like I was

00:15:37.259 --> 00:15:41.289
supposed to do more. But we moved to st. Thomas

00:15:41.289 --> 00:15:45.350
and I was better right for a little bit But you're

00:15:45.350 --> 00:15:47.789
still very aware that you're dying when you're

00:15:47.789 --> 00:15:50.470
actually sick You can feel as your kidneys stop

00:15:50.470 --> 00:15:52.610
functioning and they're on low function You can

00:15:52.610 --> 00:15:55.149
feel when you're in slow heart failure like you

00:15:55.149 --> 00:15:58.250
you can I? Thought that I was supposed to like

00:15:58.250 --> 00:16:01.789
find someone here or talk to someone do something

00:16:01.789 --> 00:16:09.830
until I died again Yeah, so you were doing a

00:16:09.830 --> 00:16:12.850
little better after the first NDE and then your

00:16:12.850 --> 00:16:15.350
health went back downhill after a few months

00:16:15.350 --> 00:16:18.970
until seven months ago. What were you feeling

00:16:18.970 --> 00:16:21.409
on that day? Did you hear the music again that

00:16:21.409 --> 00:16:25.429
particular day? I woke up and I knew that it

00:16:25.429 --> 00:16:27.909
was going to be the last day on earth, which

00:16:27.909 --> 00:16:32.450
is a very weird like knowing, right? It is weird.

00:16:32.720 --> 00:16:35.860
I just knew. And I called my husband who was

00:16:35.860 --> 00:16:37.919
at work. He was only working part -time and he

00:16:37.919 --> 00:16:39.899
had taken off for years, right? Because we had

00:16:39.899 --> 00:16:41.980
to stop working to sell the house. He was my

00:16:41.980 --> 00:16:44.200
caretaker when I got sick. So I called him because

00:16:44.200 --> 00:16:46.700
he does maintenance where we live. And I said,

00:16:46.840 --> 00:16:49.899
this is going to sound crazy, but I think I'm

00:16:49.899 --> 00:16:52.240
in terminal lucidity. And he's like, okay. And

00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:55.019
he comes home. And as soon as he came home, I

00:16:55.019 --> 00:16:58.740
heard trumpets. And I was like, there it is.

00:16:59.960 --> 00:17:04.339
So I heard trumpets. I didn't hear music. Those

00:17:04.339 --> 00:17:07.559
trumpets are indistinguishable and it sounds

00:17:07.559 --> 00:17:09.579
like they're being played through a megaphone.

00:17:09.619 --> 00:17:14.000
I mean, it's so loud. Were they the kind of trumpets

00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:17.880
like a fanfare, like a doo -doo -doo -doo kind

00:17:17.880 --> 00:17:21.019
of thing? yeah like old like think of old medieval

00:17:21.019 --> 00:17:24.839
ones but they're but they different still i don't

00:17:24.839 --> 00:17:26.900
even know if we have these trumpets on earth

00:17:26.900 --> 00:17:28.819
i gotta tell you they're the most beautiful sounding

00:17:28.819 --> 00:17:31.660
and as somebody who didn't before love brass

00:17:31.660 --> 00:17:34.559
instruments right like it's the trumpet's not

00:17:34.559 --> 00:17:37.619
necessarily the most appeasing of sounds but

00:17:37.619 --> 00:17:39.539
no these are they're incredible i could listen

00:17:39.539 --> 00:17:44.990
to them all day goodness i I knew and I felt

00:17:44.990 --> 00:17:47.710
fine, right? At that point, God had taken away

00:17:47.710 --> 00:17:50.630
all my pain. Like yes, I still had mobility aids

00:17:50.630 --> 00:17:55.829
and breathing aids, but I didn't feel sick. I

00:17:55.829 --> 00:17:58.730
just was aware that I was dying. And I think

00:17:58.730 --> 00:18:01.769
that's really where all the magic happened, right?

00:18:02.609 --> 00:18:05.519
Because... I had learned so much in my first

00:18:05.519 --> 00:18:08.500
NDE about myself and humans and how connected

00:18:08.500 --> 00:18:11.000
it is, there being no such thing as coincidence

00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:14.079
and reincarnation and the chosen and heaven and

00:18:14.079 --> 00:18:16.220
hell, which is something I think I do have to

00:18:16.220 --> 00:18:20.259
talk a little bit about, but there was no fear.

00:18:21.720 --> 00:18:24.880
But it had occurred to me over the last year

00:18:24.880 --> 00:18:27.900
that Jesus had never been mentioned. So I still

00:18:27.900 --> 00:18:31.079
wondered, okay cool, creator's real, source is

00:18:31.079 --> 00:18:33.349
real. He told me he doesn't like the word God,

00:18:33.410 --> 00:18:35.710
but like it's what we came up with. Cool. Roll

00:18:35.710 --> 00:18:39.130
with the punches. And I asked my husband to baptize

00:18:39.130 --> 00:18:41.809
me in the bathtub, and I think that it was honestly

00:18:41.809 --> 00:18:45.710
a sh - it was a reach. It was like... Well, I

00:18:45.710 --> 00:18:47.650
know God is real, and I spent most of my life

00:18:47.650 --> 00:18:50.509
convinced that he wasn't, right? So let me just

00:18:50.509 --> 00:18:55.410
like take a stab. And after he baptized me, Jesus

00:18:55.410 --> 00:18:58.890
did appear to me, and he covered me in his blood,

00:18:59.369 --> 00:19:06.569
and it was the most... beautiful gory but glorious

00:19:06.569 --> 00:19:11.210
thing. And then I got shown my parents and it

00:19:11.210 --> 00:19:14.049
was more real than anything else than my husband

00:19:14.049 --> 00:19:16.700
standing in front of me. Quick break to thank

00:19:16.700 --> 00:19:19.740
our sponsor of this episode, Pocket Hose, the

00:19:19.740 --> 00:19:23.579
world's number one expandable hose. I live on

00:19:23.579 --> 00:19:26.980
a very large lot with lawn, fruit trees, vegetable

00:19:26.980 --> 00:19:30.200
garden, flowers, all the things and that means

00:19:30.200 --> 00:19:33.759
lots of long heavy hoses to haul around to different

00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:36.480
areas and it's so frustrating when the hoses

00:19:36.480 --> 00:19:39.940
kink have to be wound up or they just plain wear

00:19:39.940 --> 00:19:43.299
out. This summer is going to be different because

00:19:43.299 --> 00:19:46.920
I just got one of the brand new pocket hose copperheads

00:19:46.920 --> 00:19:50.079
with pocket pivot. Tried it for the first time

00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:52.579
Saturday and it really is going to be a game

00:19:52.579 --> 00:19:55.980
changer. No kinks, no heavy lifting, no big hoses

00:19:55.980 --> 00:20:00.079
to wind up, and it's backed with a 10 -year warranty.

00:20:00.680 --> 00:20:03.640
So now it's time to share the love with a deal

00:20:03.640 --> 00:20:06.849
for you. For a limited time, my listeners can

00:20:06.849 --> 00:20:10.170
get a free pocket pivot and their 10 pattern

00:20:10.170 --> 00:20:13.289
sprayer with the purchase of any size copperhead

00:20:13.289 --> 00:20:18.730
hose. Just text roundtrip to 64 ,000. That's

00:20:18.730 --> 00:20:22.950
roundtrip to 64 ,000 for your two free gifts

00:20:22.950 --> 00:20:27.220
with purchase. Roundtrip to 64 ,000. Message

00:20:27.220 --> 00:20:30.160
and data rates may apply, see terms for details.

00:20:30.880 --> 00:20:34.180
Like, how can you not see this? Like, it's literally,

00:20:34.240 --> 00:20:36.880
like, he's right there, right? He was only there

00:20:36.880 --> 00:20:40.539
for a moment, and I sort of just knew that I

00:20:40.539 --> 00:20:44.680
was supposed to take my dog on a last walk, which

00:20:44.680 --> 00:20:48.819
may seem strange. I'm a dog person. Oh, my dog

00:20:48.819 --> 00:20:50.500
came to visit me the first time I died, too,

00:20:50.559 --> 00:20:53.140
so all dogs go to heaven, which is awesome, right?

00:20:53.769 --> 00:20:57.029
When I took my dog on his last walk, on my last

00:20:57.029 --> 00:20:59.890
walk with him, I picked him up and I showed him

00:20:59.890 --> 00:21:03.029
this beautiful view of St. Thomas. And I said,

00:21:03.109 --> 00:21:05.569
isn't this the most beautiful thing you've ever

00:21:05.569 --> 00:21:08.589
seen? And he never took his little pug eyes off

00:21:08.589 --> 00:21:14.029
of me. And he said, it really is. And it's almost

00:21:14.029 --> 00:21:17.930
like it was a gift. It was a gift from Jesus

00:21:17.930 --> 00:21:19.750
telling me the magic is real, right? And all

00:21:19.750 --> 00:21:22.849
these things are real. When I died the first

00:21:22.849 --> 00:21:24.569
time everybody came and talked to me, right?

00:21:24.849 --> 00:21:27.710
My mom, my dad, my best friend, my husband. But

00:21:27.710 --> 00:21:30.009
over the course of the next year, I couldn't

00:21:30.009 --> 00:21:32.130
remember the specifics about what they talked

00:21:32.130 --> 00:21:34.710
about. I just knew that they came and talked

00:21:34.710 --> 00:21:38.069
to me. And the second time, in Terminal Lucidity

00:21:38.069 --> 00:21:43.910
Hits, you get everything back. I mean, I remembered

00:21:43.910 --> 00:21:47.769
being born. I remembered every experience, every

00:21:47.769 --> 00:21:53.099
thought, everything. Terminal lucidity very much

00:21:53.099 --> 00:21:57.480
is being in both realms at once, right? You can

00:21:57.480 --> 00:22:01.319
see and feel the tether. You're able to like

00:22:01.319 --> 00:22:04.400
overhear this phone line that belongs in heaven.

00:22:04.539 --> 00:22:08.339
You're able to start to get this rush of information.

00:22:09.400 --> 00:22:11.880
But it became very clear at that moment that,

00:22:11.880 --> 00:22:14.200
you know, I needed to go home and actually like

00:22:14.200 --> 00:22:17.019
take my final lay down. I feel like I'm talking

00:22:17.019 --> 00:22:19.359
a lot. I'm sorry. I should stop. Should I stop?

00:22:19.440 --> 00:22:21.359
Don't want to interrupt because you're doing

00:22:21.359 --> 00:22:24.099
well So you just keep going for a little bit

00:22:24.099 --> 00:22:25.920
and then I have a couple of questions for you

00:22:25.920 --> 00:22:28.559
I started to get this flood of information because

00:22:28.559 --> 00:22:30.859
I realized this is I need to go lay down right

00:22:30.859 --> 00:22:33.839
like the big the big lay down So I'm walking

00:22:33.839 --> 00:22:36.200
my dog back and this is very short right because

00:22:36.200 --> 00:22:39.339
I live in a complex as I'm walking back to lay

00:22:39.339 --> 00:22:41.960
down I start getting information again almost

00:22:41.960 --> 00:22:44.039
like the speed of light like I did the first

00:22:44.039 --> 00:22:48.950
time but I was still alive It really was like

00:22:48.950 --> 00:22:51.569
I could talk to my parents real time, asking

00:22:51.569 --> 00:22:55.150
about where they were, because if I was dying

00:22:55.150 --> 00:22:58.349
for good, it wasn't, there's the dying process,

00:22:58.349 --> 00:23:01.190
and then there's the being dead process, right?

00:23:01.609 --> 00:23:05.470
I got to learn a little bit more about the layers

00:23:05.470 --> 00:23:09.490
and the levels. It's all happening so quick,

00:23:09.650 --> 00:23:13.009
right? And I go to lay in bed, and I close my

00:23:13.009 --> 00:23:16.210
eyes, and you can feel as your eyes are opening.

00:23:16.490 --> 00:23:18.650
We ever notice that when people die, their eyes

00:23:18.650 --> 00:23:22.289
open and then somebody has to come along and

00:23:22.289 --> 00:23:25.970
that's what the movies always do. Yeah. So as

00:23:25.970 --> 00:23:27.650
a caretaker for two parents that have passed

00:23:27.650 --> 00:23:30.230
away, yeah, it happens. It's a reflex. It's one

00:23:30.230 --> 00:23:32.650
I've always wondered about. I've always been

00:23:32.650 --> 00:23:36.369
curious about it. He started to show me it wasn't

00:23:36.369 --> 00:23:39.930
about me anymore or Earth or the people in it.

00:23:39.930 --> 00:23:43.210
It was about how it all tied in together. I got

00:23:43.210 --> 00:23:45.890
to see the start of it. I got to see him create

00:23:45.890 --> 00:23:48.829
the earth, the first people that walked it, the

00:23:48.829 --> 00:23:51.109
evolution that happens inside of it. I got to

00:23:51.109 --> 00:23:54.569
see the flood, the pyramids, but not just of

00:23:54.569 --> 00:23:57.569
our dimension of all. And there's so many more

00:23:57.569 --> 00:24:01.049
than 12, right? All of everything mystical and

00:24:01.049 --> 00:24:05.009
mythical and how it all can exist at the same

00:24:05.009 --> 00:24:08.109
time. And your eyes, yeah, your eyes kind of

00:24:08.109 --> 00:24:12.579
open. I remember being ripped down for I think

00:24:12.579 --> 00:24:15.920
it was adrenaline. So medics came to my house

00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:20.579
because our neighbors had smelled decomp. And

00:24:20.579 --> 00:24:24.180
so they came and checked me out and agreed, like,

00:24:24.299 --> 00:24:25.819
you're dying. Are you sure you want to die at

00:24:25.819 --> 00:24:27.200
home? And I'm like, well, I sure as hell don't

00:24:27.200 --> 00:24:28.859
want to die in a hospital if I'm not already

00:24:28.859 --> 00:24:30.880
dying right now. And they made sure I wasn't

00:24:30.880 --> 00:24:34.410
in pain. And they waited outside. and so I lay

00:24:34.410 --> 00:24:37.710
on my husband's lap well aware that he is just

00:24:37.710 --> 00:24:40.230
monitoring me but the sweet man has not slept

00:24:40.230 --> 00:24:43.609
in a very long time and I knew that I was allowed

00:24:43.609 --> 00:24:48.930
to like wait until he went to sleep sort of gosh

00:24:48.930 --> 00:24:50.930
it's all kind of confusing to explain how that

00:24:50.930 --> 00:24:58.630
happens but when I when I died I instantly shot

00:24:58.630 --> 00:25:03.309
up to God And there was no mistaking that's where

00:25:03.309 --> 00:25:09.789
I was. He is bigger than the cosmos. I got to

00:25:09.789 --> 00:25:12.829
wrap my arms around his neck. I got to sit in

00:25:12.829 --> 00:25:16.890
his lap. I got to play by his ankles. I got to

00:25:16.890 --> 00:25:19.410
go with him to work, it felt like. I got to watch

00:25:19.410 --> 00:25:23.289
him expand the universe. I got to watch him build

00:25:23.289 --> 00:25:26.160
the next... The next earth that we're all gonna

00:25:26.160 --> 00:25:29.240
be on, he showed me, he let me explore heaven

00:25:29.240 --> 00:25:31.539
and the Garden of Eden. He let me go through

00:25:31.539 --> 00:25:36.059
black holes and white holes. He explained, it

00:25:36.059 --> 00:25:40.160
was, it's everything. You get every bit of information

00:25:40.160 --> 00:25:43.440
that's ever existed in the universe all at once.

00:25:44.259 --> 00:25:48.259
It was like you understand literally everything.

00:25:48.339 --> 00:25:50.619
There's no way to describe it other than you

00:25:50.619 --> 00:25:54.839
have. It's like he shares everything with you

00:25:54.839 --> 00:25:57.660
and I remember learning about a lot of universal

00:25:57.660 --> 00:26:00.700
laws about how I could go to heaven to recharge

00:26:00.700 --> 00:26:03.339
but that there is a respect for the human brain

00:26:03.339 --> 00:26:05.240
that you don't get to remember like the inside

00:26:05.240 --> 00:26:07.640
of heaven right you get to like keep certain

00:26:07.640 --> 00:26:09.980
bits and same with like the detail on God's face

00:26:09.980 --> 00:26:13.539
like I can tell you he's blue but like his facial

00:26:13.539 --> 00:26:16.539
like you don't get to remember it you know but

00:26:16.539 --> 00:26:20.059
I did I it was like Got to see the past and the

00:26:20.059 --> 00:26:22.319
present in the future. I got to see I got to

00:26:22.319 --> 00:26:27.200
see everything I mean Everything and then he

00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:30.039
he told me that he was giving me a new heart

00:26:30.039 --> 00:26:33.720
and lungs and the next thing that I remember

00:26:33.720 --> 00:26:36.480
is my husband kissing me because he had been

00:26:36.480 --> 00:26:38.740
holding on he had been holding on to my cold

00:26:38.740 --> 00:26:41.200
dead body for an hour not ready to let the medics

00:26:41.200 --> 00:26:43.599
take it and When he was finally ready to let

00:26:43.599 --> 00:26:46.339
them take my body. He kissed me one last time

00:26:46.339 --> 00:26:49.529
and I took a breath And that's like I went from

00:26:49.529 --> 00:26:52.390
being with God to like with my husband in these

00:26:52.390 --> 00:26:54.750
medics and everybody is like shocked and terrified

00:26:54.750 --> 00:26:57.509
because they're like what the right and I'm like

00:26:57.509 --> 00:27:01.049
and the first breath that I took was the cleanest

00:27:01.049 --> 00:27:03.269
breath I've ever taken there was nothing wrong

00:27:03.269 --> 00:27:06.289
with my heart anymore my lungs were great my

00:27:06.289 --> 00:27:09.710
kidneys my liver I was hungry I knew that I could

00:27:09.710 --> 00:27:14.009
get up and go to the bathroom and and I I had

00:27:14.009 --> 00:27:17.599
been healed and I knew it, I knew it right then

00:27:17.599 --> 00:27:20.839
and I felt like I could run a marathon so they

00:27:20.839 --> 00:27:23.000
rushed me to the hospital and they do a bunch

00:27:23.000 --> 00:27:27.220
of tests and they're like we can't explain this

00:27:27.220 --> 00:27:30.039
but you look like a healthy 33 year old 34 year

00:27:30.039 --> 00:27:33.539
old like your organs look good We can't see the

00:27:33.539 --> 00:27:36.099
past trauma anymore from heart attacks, from

00:27:36.099 --> 00:27:39.079
strokes, signs of internal bleeding. Like there's

00:27:39.079 --> 00:27:42.819
no, you look, you're great. Like we have read

00:27:42.819 --> 00:27:44.839
about this, we don't understand it, but like

00:27:44.839 --> 00:27:47.359
what can I do for you? And I was like nothing

00:27:47.359 --> 00:27:50.460
because I knew that going from 40 medications,

00:27:50.519 --> 00:27:52.960
like I knew I wasn't meant to take medicine anymore.

00:27:53.480 --> 00:27:55.240
And so I said nothing, like I don't want anything.

00:27:55.420 --> 00:27:57.599
I just like the medics want to know I'm not a

00:27:57.599 --> 00:28:00.359
zombie, I guess, right? and they let me go and

00:28:00.359 --> 00:28:02.819
it's been seven months and I do yoga and I do

00:28:02.819 --> 00:28:06.359
ballet and and I go hiking and I can eat anything

00:28:06.359 --> 00:28:09.680
I want when I hadn't eaten in like months like

00:28:09.680 --> 00:28:12.220
feeding tubes are no joke and I'm healthy now

00:28:12.220 --> 00:28:15.279
and it's um it's been crazy to make sense of

00:28:15.279 --> 00:28:20.900
because I came back with a lot of understanding

00:28:20.900 --> 00:28:22.579
of things that there's no way that that could

00:28:22.579 --> 00:28:25.480
be real or right things that about stem cells

00:28:25.480 --> 00:28:28.920
and and you know all these things and and then

00:28:28.920 --> 00:28:32.660
they start turning out to be true and it's it's

00:28:32.660 --> 00:28:36.380
even crazier because that means that if a lot

00:28:36.380 --> 00:28:38.880
of what I saw has already been studied and proven

00:28:38.880 --> 00:28:42.559
then this other stuff I saw the things that are

00:28:42.559 --> 00:28:46.299
coming our way and the next earth and the fact

00:28:46.299 --> 00:28:48.920
that hell is more than just a state of consciousness

00:28:48.920 --> 00:28:51.940
like people think because a lot of people talk

00:28:51.940 --> 00:28:54.519
about this new age like heaven and hell are states

00:28:54.519 --> 00:28:57.220
of states of mind right and they they are but

00:28:57.220 --> 00:29:00.220
they're they have their own geographical location

00:29:00.220 --> 00:29:02.440
right and i got to watch the world end and coming

00:29:02.440 --> 00:29:04.480
back to grips with that has all been really hard

00:29:04.480 --> 00:29:06.779
because now i just keep wondering like you can't

00:29:06.779 --> 00:29:09.319
have some of it real and not all of it and i

00:29:09.319 --> 00:29:10.720
feel like now i've been talking for a really

00:29:10.720 --> 00:29:15.079
long time i'm done i feel like i haven't breathed

00:29:15.079 --> 00:29:18.880
for about five minutes so in no particular order

00:29:18.880 --> 00:29:24.190
a few questions First of all, how long did your

00:29:24.190 --> 00:29:27.529
husband say that you had been dead with the medics

00:29:27.529 --> 00:29:31.589
waiting outside? So about 50 minutes. That's

00:29:31.589 --> 00:29:33.930
just I'll just answer the question. 50 minutes.

00:29:34.250 --> 00:29:38.089
Okay. That's a long time. It felt like I was

00:29:38.089 --> 00:29:41.230
gone for years. I mean, I literally got to go

00:29:41.230 --> 00:29:45.250
more places than I mean, when I came back, I

00:29:45.250 --> 00:29:47.410
thought it was 2026. Like, there was no brain

00:29:47.410 --> 00:29:49.750
damage, but psychologically, I did not still

00:29:49.750 --> 00:29:53.490
think it was 2025. I can say that. I thought

00:29:53.490 --> 00:29:56.750
I was gone for a year. My biggest question that

00:29:56.750 --> 00:29:59.369
I want to know the most is the time that you

00:29:59.369 --> 00:30:01.329
spent with God and you talked about putting your

00:30:01.329 --> 00:30:05.250
arms around his neck. How did you feel at that

00:30:05.250 --> 00:30:07.609
time? I know you can't remember all the download,

00:30:07.930 --> 00:30:11.859
but I'll bet you can remember how you felt. it's

00:30:11.859 --> 00:30:14.240
the problem other than the details from inside

00:30:14.240 --> 00:30:18.140
of heaven which is a layer by the way it is what

00:30:18.140 --> 00:30:20.920
we think of as heaven is a layer and other than

00:30:20.920 --> 00:30:22.740
the details of his face and stuff like that no

00:30:22.740 --> 00:30:25.420
i do remember it all and that's the problem it

00:30:25.420 --> 00:30:27.680
recharges you're allowed to go hug him anytime

00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:29.839
you want and you can stay there for as long as

00:30:29.839 --> 00:30:32.359
you want because time isn't real it doesn't exist

00:30:32.359 --> 00:30:36.480
but it recharges right and you can like see it

00:30:36.480 --> 00:30:39.359
and you can feel it and i don't know why me wanting

00:30:39.359 --> 00:30:41.680
to wrap my arms around his neck was such a big

00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:44.720
deal maybe because he had a neck right like you

00:30:44.720 --> 00:30:48.740
just want to and it's recharging and it's like

00:30:48.740 --> 00:30:51.440
he is he's bigger than the cosmos right so like

00:30:51.440 --> 00:30:54.059
a million people could fit in his lap at once

00:30:54.059 --> 00:30:58.579
except when you're sitting in it it's so cozy

00:30:59.160 --> 00:31:01.700
And when you're sitting in his lap, you get to

00:31:01.700 --> 00:31:04.640
see from his point of view. And that's crazy.

00:31:04.759 --> 00:31:08.099
I mean, it's recharging. It really is recharging.

00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:10.720
Because I think people really only think about

00:31:10.720 --> 00:31:13.380
there being heaven and hell rather than layers

00:31:13.380 --> 00:31:16.240
of heaven, layers of cosmos, layers of hell,

00:31:16.319 --> 00:31:21.279
where he sits, how he runs it. It looks like

00:31:21.279 --> 00:31:31.269
a Merkaba shaped dodecahedron. of the sand inside

00:31:31.269 --> 00:31:34.089
of like a capsule flowing and folding into the

00:31:34.089 --> 00:31:38.269
universe because he has got Jesus on his right

00:31:38.269 --> 00:31:40.789
and then he's got the archangels, Michael and

00:31:40.789 --> 00:31:43.930
Gabriel, which I gotta tell you, I knew nothing,

00:31:44.289 --> 00:31:46.890
nothing of religious education at all before

00:31:46.890 --> 00:31:49.109
I died. So to come back to life and be telling

00:31:49.109 --> 00:31:51.930
my husband, like I met somebody named Gabriel

00:31:51.930 --> 00:31:54.950
and Michael and my husband who was raised with

00:31:54.950 --> 00:31:57.470
religious backing is looking at me like, How

00:31:57.470 --> 00:32:00.049
do you seriously not know who they are, right?

00:32:00.309 --> 00:32:02.589
But there's God and there's Jesus and then the

00:32:02.589 --> 00:32:05.650
angels and there's the way that people sit behind

00:32:05.650 --> 00:32:08.349
and to the sides and the way it flows. And so

00:32:08.349 --> 00:32:13.549
you're sitting there recharging, healing, feeling

00:32:13.549 --> 00:32:16.250
like why do people choose to recharge in heaven

00:32:16.250 --> 00:32:20.430
when you could recharge in God's lap? And to

00:32:20.430 --> 00:32:25.119
watch it all, it's It's recharging that's really

00:32:25.119 --> 00:32:27.900
like I know I keep saying that but one thing

00:32:27.900 --> 00:32:30.440
I learned is that time is the only Calculable

00:32:30.440 --> 00:32:34.359
currency and so the time that we spend doing

00:32:34.359 --> 00:32:38.640
anything is based on what? We need and what we've

00:32:38.640 --> 00:32:42.079
earned up there Because you can when you go through

00:32:42.079 --> 00:32:44.799
all the levels you can see all the different

00:32:44.799 --> 00:32:47.299
people working their jobs all the angels all

00:32:47.299 --> 00:32:51.009
the chosen all the All the spirits and energies

00:32:51.009 --> 00:32:52.609
and whatever you want to call them. But when

00:32:52.609 --> 00:32:56.529
you're in his lap, he's like holding you and

00:32:56.529 --> 00:33:02.509
you get to just see it all indescribable. You

00:33:02.509 --> 00:33:06.150
mentioned something about you got to go around

00:33:06.150 --> 00:33:09.109
with him. It almost sounded like take a daughter

00:33:09.109 --> 00:33:12.769
to work day. Oh, my gosh. It really did. It really

00:33:12.769 --> 00:33:16.930
did because he let me he he I got to watch him

00:33:16.930 --> 00:33:20.940
expand the universe. What did that look like?

00:33:21.720 --> 00:33:25.880
The Bible says he speaks and it happens But with

00:33:25.880 --> 00:33:28.480
there being no sound up there he really just

00:33:28.480 --> 00:33:31.380
like thinks and it happens But when you're like

00:33:31.380 --> 00:33:34.140
with him he like shares the thought so you get

00:33:34.140 --> 00:33:39.819
to like observe it firsthand sort of and it's

00:33:39.819 --> 00:33:45.440
Indescribable it's like an ex it's the opposite

00:33:45.759 --> 00:33:48.140
See, I want to say it's the opposite of an explosion,

00:33:48.180 --> 00:33:50.059
but that's an implosion and that's still not

00:33:50.059 --> 00:33:53.400
right. It's a burst. It's a burst and expansion

00:33:53.400 --> 00:33:56.359
and the way he throws it all together and to

00:33:56.359 --> 00:33:59.599
build atmospheres of each planet and how each

00:33:59.599 --> 00:34:03.519
one plays its role in the universe. I think the

00:34:03.519 --> 00:34:05.900
word explosion, you were saying it didn't fit

00:34:05.900 --> 00:34:09.699
because we think of explosion as something that

00:34:09.699 --> 00:34:13.920
it ruins things and it blows things up and you're

00:34:13.920 --> 00:34:18.369
talking about creation. Yeah, I am. Correct me

00:34:18.369 --> 00:34:20.269
if I'm wrong, but I think you're talking about

00:34:20.269 --> 00:34:23.250
expansion without destroying anything, right?

00:34:23.730 --> 00:34:25.949
Yes, but it does, you know, and it's funny because

00:34:25.949 --> 00:34:29.849
we say energy can't be destroyed, but it does

00:34:29.849 --> 00:34:33.090
get turned into something else. Yeah, energy

00:34:33.090 --> 00:34:37.150
can be changed. Yes, transferred, yes. Yeah,

00:34:37.150 --> 00:34:40.750
and that's part of what creation is. It doesn't

00:34:40.750 --> 00:34:43.690
necessarily mean making something out of nothing.

00:34:44.159 --> 00:34:47.099
It can mean changing something from one form

00:34:47.099 --> 00:34:50.760
to another, right? Right. Like when you create

00:34:50.760 --> 00:34:55.059
a painting, you're not creating it out of nothing.

00:34:56.099 --> 00:34:59.820
You're taking paint and an easel and a brush

00:34:59.820 --> 00:35:02.619
and you're taking these things and then creating

00:35:02.619 --> 00:35:05.619
something amazing. That's how I've always pictured

00:35:05.619 --> 00:35:09.010
how he creates. Yes. Yes, that's really good

00:35:09.010 --> 00:35:10.949
too. I always use the comparison or I use the

00:35:10.949 --> 00:35:13.070
comparison now. It's like baking a cake. You

00:35:13.070 --> 00:35:14.630
know, you pray for something and then he gives

00:35:14.630 --> 00:35:17.449
you the eggs and the flour and the milk and the

00:35:17.449 --> 00:35:20.730
and you're like, why don't I have a cake? All

00:35:20.730 --> 00:35:22.550
right. Let's talk about something that you alluded

00:35:22.550 --> 00:35:26.030
to a couple of times. Heaven and hell. What did

00:35:26.030 --> 00:35:29.030
you learn about those two? And I'm going to call

00:35:29.030 --> 00:35:31.610
them places because you said that's sort of how

00:35:31.610 --> 00:35:35.510
you used it. Yeah. Yes. So there are slivers

00:35:35.510 --> 00:35:38.250
of both on earth. There is a slice of heaven

00:35:38.250 --> 00:35:40.570
on earth and there is a slice of hell and hell

00:35:40.570 --> 00:35:43.090
on earth and both can be found within your consciousness

00:35:43.090 --> 00:35:47.550
Everybody has got beams of light a glow Something

00:35:47.550 --> 00:35:50.670
inside and essentially the very next dimension

00:35:50.670 --> 00:35:53.630
because there's so many That's how they view

00:35:53.630 --> 00:35:56.090
us is through our beams of light, right? And

00:35:56.090 --> 00:35:58.949
some are dimming and they can stay dim for a

00:35:58.949 --> 00:36:02.800
very long time, but until until they go out And

00:36:02.800 --> 00:36:05.059
when they've gone out is when they start to experience

00:36:05.059 --> 00:36:09.460
hell on earth. People often might manifest this

00:36:09.460 --> 00:36:14.239
with the throws of addiction or a terrible sickness,

00:36:14.440 --> 00:36:18.139
right? Or, you know, being truly, truly lost.

00:36:18.340 --> 00:36:20.380
These are like states of mind that are heaven

00:36:20.380 --> 00:36:24.719
and hell on earth. But when I was exploring around,

00:36:25.179 --> 00:36:29.480
I very much learned That they are so much more

00:36:29.480 --> 00:36:31.760
than that because you have to put a slice of

00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:34.500
heaven and hell on earth It's hard to explain

00:36:34.500 --> 00:36:37.199
but when he was showing me this next earth how

00:36:37.199 --> 00:36:38.980
he builds it and all the things that are there

00:36:38.980 --> 00:36:40.840
and all the different kinds of life that go into

00:36:40.840 --> 00:36:43.980
it and what creates the atmosphere and so he's

00:36:43.980 --> 00:36:47.500
saying you know that hell is there for our safety

00:36:47.500 --> 00:36:52.719
and That it wasn't for me to go visit only to

00:36:52.719 --> 00:36:56.760
understand through observation So first I flew

00:36:56.760 --> 00:36:59.539
around the Garden of Eden and I got to see truly

00:36:59.539 --> 00:37:04.119
how it blossoms through our love here. It was

00:37:04.119 --> 00:37:08.500
so real. It was so overflowing. Like a rainforest

00:37:08.500 --> 00:37:12.280
of flowers, really. And I got to see several

00:37:12.280 --> 00:37:14.900
different layers of heaven and how all the workers

00:37:14.900 --> 00:37:18.380
kind of go together because I learned that my

00:37:18.380 --> 00:37:20.619
parents are not. While my parents both went to

00:37:20.619 --> 00:37:24.039
heaven, they live on different levels or layers

00:37:24.039 --> 00:37:27.730
of heaven. And with hell, I had to understand

00:37:27.730 --> 00:37:30.530
that it was for our safety first, because while

00:37:30.530 --> 00:37:35.110
humans can go to hell, it's not just humans that

00:37:35.110 --> 00:37:39.809
are out there. It's not just us in a galaxy that's

00:37:39.809 --> 00:37:42.409
infinite. There is other life out there, and

00:37:42.409 --> 00:37:44.909
whether we want to call them aliens or create

00:37:44.909 --> 00:37:47.869
some other name for them, there is a plethora

00:37:47.869 --> 00:37:50.869
of light and dark and good and evil, because

00:37:50.869 --> 00:37:52.949
light and dark don't equate to good and evil,

00:37:53.429 --> 00:37:59.110
but that There does need to be That's a it's

00:37:59.110 --> 00:38:01.789
a it's a really hard one to explain what I saw

00:38:01.789 --> 00:38:05.070
of how Was truly what I believe was just that

00:38:05.070 --> 00:38:08.389
first Like a level layer and the best way I can

00:38:08.389 --> 00:38:11.150
describe it is it being void of color? Now that

00:38:11.150 --> 00:38:14.650
may not seem like that big of a deal, but when

00:38:14.650 --> 00:38:19.150
you die you get to see Colors that don't exist

00:38:19.150 --> 00:38:21.590
to the naked eye I mean there's a million trillion

00:38:21.590 --> 00:38:25.250
more than we get to see in our rainbow and The

00:38:25.250 --> 00:38:27.510
saturation of them and the vibrancy of them and

00:38:27.510 --> 00:38:29.949
the and the mixing of them. There's so many so

00:38:29.949 --> 00:38:34.440
to not have like any I think is very telling

00:38:34.440 --> 00:38:37.780
on its own. When you're on the other side, whether

00:38:37.780 --> 00:38:40.219
you're with God or in the cosmos or in heaven,

00:38:40.500 --> 00:38:43.000
telepathy is real, right? And I wish we came

00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:44.579
up with a different word for that because I sound

00:38:44.579 --> 00:38:46.340
like a woo -woo person every time I see that,

00:38:46.340 --> 00:38:48.920
but you know, we don't use our basic five human

00:38:48.920 --> 00:38:51.519
senses over there, right? Your consciousness

00:38:51.519 --> 00:38:55.639
speaks, and in hell they can't communicate. They

00:38:55.639 --> 00:38:58.800
can't communicate, there's no color, there is

00:38:58.800 --> 00:39:01.659
still no time, but they're aware of there being

00:39:01.659 --> 00:39:04.860
no time. Whereas in heaven, there's no time,

00:39:04.860 --> 00:39:07.900
but you don't you're not even aware of it. You

00:39:07.900 --> 00:39:11.440
don't care There's just no right and so in hell

00:39:11.440 --> 00:39:13.900
it is you're cognizant of how never -ending it

00:39:13.900 --> 00:39:17.860
is and they looked they looked kind of like zombies

00:39:17.860 --> 00:39:22.980
in the sense that they were Blistered and boiled

00:39:22.980 --> 00:39:26.300
they were broken. They were torn. They were half

00:39:26.300 --> 00:39:29.780
dead You know, they wandered around and you could

00:39:29.780 --> 00:39:32.900
tell that they In a weird way, you could tell

00:39:32.900 --> 00:39:35.119
that they were all screaming, even though it

00:39:35.119 --> 00:39:39.460
was completely void of sound. But I quickly got

00:39:39.460 --> 00:39:42.840
pulled from that because it went from that to

00:39:42.840 --> 00:39:46.139
showing me the future. I watched the end of the

00:39:46.139 --> 00:39:48.840
world. I watched what it looks like for the heavens

00:39:48.840 --> 00:39:51.860
to be ripped open and for Jesus to make his way

00:39:51.860 --> 00:39:54.980
back down to Africa. Okay, tell me a whole bunch

00:39:54.980 --> 00:39:57.559
more about that. Fill in some blanks on that.

00:39:58.239 --> 00:40:02.769
Well, It was definitely the future You know that

00:40:02.769 --> 00:40:05.710
I was looking at because a lot of other things

00:40:05.710 --> 00:40:10.769
There had been so much evolution You could see

00:40:10.769 --> 00:40:13.730
all the angels right all of the energy is and

00:40:13.730 --> 00:40:17.730
everything kind of working together Because it

00:40:17.730 --> 00:40:21.289
was it's time God I I feel like I'm gonna sound

00:40:21.289 --> 00:40:24.010
crazy if I explain this and that's I think that

00:40:24.010 --> 00:40:27.130
my biggest fear about doing this all because

00:40:29.329 --> 00:40:31.530
I don't even know how to say this without sounding

00:40:31.530 --> 00:40:34.050
crazy. I think that there are good aliens and

00:40:34.050 --> 00:40:36.110
I think that there are bad aliens. And I think

00:40:36.110 --> 00:40:38.989
that oftentimes we might be calling these bad

00:40:38.989 --> 00:40:41.150
aliens demons, right? Because I do think that

00:40:41.150 --> 00:40:43.690
there are also some demonic forces that now walk

00:40:43.690 --> 00:40:46.849
around. It's crazy to hear myself say out loud

00:40:46.849 --> 00:40:50.329
compared to my whole life. We're always moving

00:40:50.329 --> 00:40:54.230
in the cosmos. And part of the reason that he

00:40:54.230 --> 00:40:56.710
has to expand and make a new Earth is because

00:40:56.710 --> 00:40:59.550
our Earth's heartbeat is dying. and the humans

00:40:59.550 --> 00:41:03.070
have been fighting the humans stuck in this big

00:41:03.070 --> 00:41:07.389
battle when it really soon is gonna need to be

00:41:07.389 --> 00:41:11.929
more about mankind about what's coming our way

00:41:11.929 --> 00:41:15.429
because while there is a lot out there what is

00:41:15.429 --> 00:41:19.630
the closest to us is not playing for our team

00:41:19.630 --> 00:41:28.630
so people need to wake up and choose God and

00:41:28.630 --> 00:41:30.989
choose love and light so we can all start working

00:41:30.989 --> 00:41:34.010
together because our energy does help thrust

00:41:34.010 --> 00:41:39.250
us. God always wins, Jesus always prevails. Watching

00:41:39.250 --> 00:41:42.750
it was like there's this big red carpet that

00:41:42.750 --> 00:41:45.570
gets laid out and it's like it gets spread out

00:41:45.570 --> 00:41:50.090
through... I mean, I don't, you know, where God

00:41:50.090 --> 00:41:52.550
sits in relation to the planets is such a hard

00:41:52.550 --> 00:41:56.300
thing to explain, so... and you're watching all

00:41:56.300 --> 00:42:00.159
the angels come down and they open up the skies

00:42:00.159 --> 00:42:06.059
and they form into this chariot if you will and

00:42:06.059 --> 00:42:10.860
he rides down to Africa and it's it I didn't

00:42:10.860 --> 00:42:13.420
know until I came back to life because I had

00:42:13.420 --> 00:42:16.639
never read the Bible that what I had seen was

00:42:16.639 --> 00:42:20.380
revelations Which is also really interesting

00:42:20.380 --> 00:42:22.940
though because God did make it very very very

00:42:22.940 --> 00:42:25.300
very clear to me that all religions have about

00:42:25.300 --> 00:42:27.900
10 % right and they need to slam together in

00:42:27.900 --> 00:42:30.579
order to get the complete truth. So I'm still

00:42:30.579 --> 00:42:34.460
kind of working my way through a lot of this.

00:42:34.679 --> 00:42:36.780
I haven't really talked about like the end of

00:42:36.780 --> 00:42:39.599
the world or really any of this publicly like

00:42:39.599 --> 00:42:43.659
this before because I'm still trying to make

00:42:43.659 --> 00:42:47.000
sense of it on my own I suppose. Seven months

00:42:47.000 --> 00:42:49.679
is not a long time. It's gonna take you a while

00:42:49.679 --> 00:42:52.900
to work through all this I've never gone so long

00:42:52.900 --> 00:42:58.159
without working like it's it's I I've been focusing

00:42:58.159 --> 00:43:01.260
on being close to God and eating right and keeping

00:43:01.260 --> 00:43:03.179
my child like a wonderment, but I got to tell

00:43:03.179 --> 00:43:09.480
you it So weird it's so weird being Being back

00:43:09.480 --> 00:43:11.980
because our love here doesn't compare our joy

00:43:11.980 --> 00:43:15.599
here doesn't compare our color here doesn't compare

00:43:15.599 --> 00:43:21.559
and time moves so Strangely Alright couple more

00:43:21.559 --> 00:43:24.940
things before we finish up here I alluded to

00:43:24.940 --> 00:43:26.699
the fact earlier because you and I talked about

00:43:26.699 --> 00:43:31.599
it last week about your name change or new name

00:43:31.599 --> 00:43:35.719
or Tell me about your name So, you know, I grew

00:43:35.719 --> 00:43:37.780
up in the same house my whole life and I grew

00:43:37.780 --> 00:43:40.679
up with Seven other people who had the same first

00:43:40.679 --> 00:43:42.699
and middle name and we were all so different.

00:43:42.699 --> 00:43:45.659
So I think from the time I was a kid being born

00:43:45.659 --> 00:43:49.820
Rebecca Ann, it just never fit. And I never found

00:43:49.820 --> 00:43:51.579
it fair that we get to choose everything about

00:43:51.579 --> 00:43:53.579
ourselves and not the name that represents us.

00:43:53.659 --> 00:43:56.280
So I changed my name to Riley before my parents

00:43:56.280 --> 00:43:59.460
died. And that is truly how I know myself. But

00:43:59.460 --> 00:44:01.880
I think just through a series of existential

00:44:01.880 --> 00:44:06.280
crises, I was hoping that if God renamed me,

00:44:06.360 --> 00:44:08.980
it would just like put an end to all of that

00:44:08.980 --> 00:44:12.070
and squash it. And it would be. You know, so

00:44:12.070 --> 00:44:14.309
I asked God, you know, if you're giving me new

00:44:14.309 --> 00:44:17.510
life, do you give me a new name? And at that

00:44:17.510 --> 00:44:20.389
point, I didn't get the overwhelming of him speaking

00:44:20.389 --> 00:44:23.309
to me the way that, you know, I did before. Instead,

00:44:23.329 --> 00:44:25.010
it was more like I was just getting imagery.

00:44:25.110 --> 00:44:28.210
And he showed me a bundle of white lilies. And

00:44:28.210 --> 00:44:31.949
I took that as, okay, I'm Lily now. And it's

00:44:31.949 --> 00:44:34.409
hard. It's hard. You know, I thought that was

00:44:34.409 --> 00:44:37.010
gonna break me fist. It really should, right?

00:44:37.090 --> 00:44:39.829
But old habits die hard because I still find

00:44:39.829 --> 00:44:42.489
myself constantly introducing myself as Riley

00:44:42.489 --> 00:44:46.789
or responding to Riley. But I, yeah, you know,

00:44:46.789 --> 00:44:50.590
I asked for it. I ask and you shall receive.

00:44:51.769 --> 00:44:57.429
Yeah, okay. This show is all about hope, okay?

00:44:58.429 --> 00:45:00.550
Because we live in kind of a tough place at a

00:45:00.550 --> 00:45:03.780
tough time right now. And for a lot of people

00:45:03.780 --> 00:45:06.059
they're struggling to have some kind of hope

00:45:06.059 --> 00:45:09.699
because they feel loss, they feel tragedy, they

00:45:09.699 --> 00:45:12.980
feel the weight of the world on their shoulders.

00:45:13.420 --> 00:45:17.599
You get that. I want you to try to describe in

00:45:17.599 --> 00:45:20.639
any more detail if you can what it was like to

00:45:20.639 --> 00:45:24.139
sit on God's lap and why that should give hope

00:45:24.139 --> 00:45:29.579
to others. So I think the thing about I keep

00:45:29.579 --> 00:45:32.059
making it a point to say you get every question

00:45:32.059 --> 00:45:34.360
ever answered like that you've ever wondered

00:45:34.360 --> 00:45:37.300
answered and I don't think our recall on what

00:45:37.300 --> 00:45:40.019
those answers are is are as important as the

00:45:40.019 --> 00:45:43.960
fact that there is an answer for every single

00:45:43.960 --> 00:45:48.699
thing every Hardship every weight every cancer

00:45:48.699 --> 00:45:52.699
every sickness every injustice that we see we

00:45:52.699 --> 00:45:58.079
think that that it can't be glorious, but He

00:45:58.079 --> 00:46:02.960
is truly glorious. I've seen it. Because I used

00:46:02.960 --> 00:46:05.679
to feel that same way and the truth is that he

00:46:05.679 --> 00:46:10.219
does not do anything without not only reason

00:46:10.219 --> 00:46:13.719
and balance, but also gifts that come with it.

00:46:13.980 --> 00:46:17.000
We may not see them and understand them. But

00:46:17.000 --> 00:46:20.099
that's the same way that, like, you're mixing

00:46:20.099 --> 00:46:22.699
oatmeal for a kid that's right there and it's

00:46:22.699 --> 00:46:24.539
like the kid's just like, I'm hungry, I'm hungry,

00:46:24.599 --> 00:46:27.360
I'm hungry, why aren't you feeding me? Not seeing

00:46:27.360 --> 00:46:30.079
that, like, parents just hasn't given it to them

00:46:30.079 --> 00:46:32.980
yet, right? I think what weighs us down are the

00:46:32.980 --> 00:46:37.099
questions without answers. But there should be

00:46:37.099 --> 00:46:41.659
hope that there are answers to absolutely everything,

00:46:41.920 --> 00:46:46.119
that everything is balanced. that God, you just

00:46:46.119 --> 00:46:53.280
have to seek him and that he truly is the most

00:46:53.280 --> 00:46:58.159
omnipotent that there could ever be. I think

00:46:58.159 --> 00:47:01.780
we need to relinquish a lot of control, which

00:47:01.780 --> 00:47:05.460
is hard, but I was an atheist and I got to see

00:47:05.460 --> 00:47:08.400
God, so I also don't want people to be scared

00:47:08.400 --> 00:47:11.769
of this like biblical telling or this baptist

00:47:11.769 --> 00:47:14.650
telling of you know fear god because god doesn't

00:47:14.650 --> 00:47:16.630
want to be feared he wants to be loved right

00:47:16.630 --> 00:47:19.769
but this whole idea that you can't be in god's

00:47:19.769 --> 00:47:22.969
presence if you haven't done x y or z it's it's

00:47:22.969 --> 00:47:25.449
so much more complex than that because his love

00:47:25.449 --> 00:47:30.889
is so unconditional and it's so overwhelming

00:47:30.889 --> 00:47:36.389
and this is just a waiting period because The

00:47:36.389 --> 00:47:39.269
answers, when you get them, they all make sense

00:47:39.269 --> 00:47:42.269
and you realize that nothing could shift or be

00:47:42.269 --> 00:47:46.210
any different and it still work out the way it

00:47:46.210 --> 00:47:52.110
needs to. God is love. Riley, thank you so much

00:47:52.110 --> 00:47:54.369
for being with me today. It's been awesome. I

00:47:54.369 --> 00:47:58.150
appreciate it. I'm sorry that I talk a lot, but

00:47:58.150 --> 00:48:01.269
thank you so much. This has been wonderful for

00:48:01.269 --> 00:48:06.269
me to work through. Have your support, all of

00:48:06.269 --> 00:48:10.110
it. Thank you, I'm honored. Thanks again for

00:48:10.110 --> 00:48:12.710
listening and sharing this podcast. Don't forget

00:48:12.710 --> 00:48:15.489
to hit the follow or subscribe button and sign

00:48:15.489 --> 00:48:17.789
up for our newsletter at roundtripdeath .com.

00:48:18.349 --> 00:48:20.670
If you want to share your near -death experience

00:48:20.670 --> 00:48:22.929
or if you have questions or comments about the

00:48:22.929 --> 00:48:25.809
show, send an email to eric at roundtripdeath

00:48:25.809 --> 00:48:28.989
.com. Until then, I wish you everything good

00:48:28.989 --> 00:48:31.289
that you're looking for in this life and the

00:48:31.289 --> 00:48:31.690
next.